Are all friendships built to last?

Are friendships meant to last for years and years, or are they more transient relationships? Does friendship make you a better person or can it make you weaker?

Throughout our lives we go through many different stages of friendship – from elementary school to university, the relationships made during these times help shape us into the people we are. Even bad friendships can teach us how to handle difficult situations and show us the type of person we want to be around.

Friendships forged in kindergarten are not always going to last forever, and the same can be said about any of the friends in our lives. It’s completely natural to outgrow each other, especially during our more formative years.

Signs it’s time to let the friendship go

After a falling out a friendship might be left in a precarious situation, however there are numerous red flags to look out for which may signal that the friendship has reached its expiration date and it’s time to let the friendship go.

When jealousy and competition become more prevalent, the friendship can turn into a toxic environment for all parties involved. Friends are meant to build each other up, not break each other down. While feelings of jealousy are normal, it’s important to recognize when those feelings become consuming.

How to break up with a friend for good

Letting a friendship go can be a really hard thing to do, so it’s no wonder how so many people stay “friends” with people long after the friendship has turned sour.

Once you have made the decision to end the friendship, it’s helpful to remind yourself why you’re doing this: has the friendship been plateauing for a while? Or maybe your friend manipulates and exploits your good nature? Whatever your reason for letting the friendship go, remember that you’re doing this for yourself and everyone deserves to have strong, healthy friendships in their lives.

As is the case with any break up, the most important goal is to minimize damage and end things in an amicable way. Of course, this is not always possible, especially if the friendship has become tumultuous or if things have turned spiteful. Mary and Sienna talk through one of the best ways to make a clean break when letting a friendship go.

Consequences of ending a friendship

Newtown’s Third Law states: “for every action, there is an equal and opposite reaction.” This law applies to friendship just as much as it applies to physics, especially when a friendship is terminated.

Depending on whether or not the break up was amicable, there may be a certain level of fall out to deal with in the aftermath. One of the more common ways this manifests is in a larger friend group that both parties are involved with. Although nobody wants to take sides in these situations, sometimes a falling out between friends can be enough to shift the scales one way or the other.

Resources

• How To Break Up With Your Friend via WikiHow.
• 8 Signs It’s Time to Break Up With a Friend by Kali Rogers via Huffington Post.
• 8 Eye-Opening Signs Your Friend Does Not Want To Be Your Friend Anymore by Catherine LaChance via The Odyssey Online.
• 10 signs you and your best friend are drifting apart by Kenya Foy via HelloGiggles.
• 9 Signs You’re Outgrowing a Friendship – and What to Do About It by Julia Dellitt via The Everygirl.

Tune in next week for Episode 24: Be Your Own BFF

Do you have a story about friendship? Good, bad, or ugly — we wanna hear it! Click here to learn more about submitting your story and you might just hear it in a future episode or featured on the blog!

Hosted by Mary Akemon and Sienna Mooney
Produced by Alex Papworth
Music by Max Wallace
Episode illustration by Maddy Vian