As a young man, I wasn’t very good at making friends. I was nervous, awkward, bad at sports, cried easily, gave up quickly, avoided putting in effort. Most of these things are still true as an adult.
Isn’t that the similar to saying “just put yourself out there”? Yes, but reframing a platitude can make it click and become useful.
Maintaining strong friendships is hard enough as an adult. Let alone when that friend is your ex-girlfriend.
Keeping in touch with long distance friends is hard. You have to put some real effort in. You can’t just run into each other on the streetcar and impulsively decide to go get coffee and catch up.
Work friends is a topic that leaves me feeling conflicted. It can be absolutely wonderful or it can be catastrophic. It all depends on situation and the people involved.
I discovered that the best way to tell if someone is a friend or an acquaintance is to ask yourself: “Would I invite them to lunch, and not feel awkward if they said yes?”